Lately I’ve been noticing some disturbing symptoms which seem to point to the fact that I MAY be becoming what the kids refer to as “old”. It started with my deteriorating eyesight, then I started making very strange grunting type noises whenever I tried to move my body after sitting still for too long, THEN I noticed some strangely silver coloured hairs on my head, but the most recent and most disturbing of these new symptoms of old age has to be the fact that I seem to have lost my short term memory.
In the last three weeks, I have been to the Walmart at least 23 times, which is a lot for someone who has no money. Before you start worrying about me blowing money I don’t have (which is totally something I’d do), you can relax because every time that I’ve gone to the Walmart (because I’ve spent all day thinking I HAVE TO GO TO WALMART) I’ve gotten there and walked around for at least an hour and could not figure out what I could possibly have needed only to leave empty handed.
Now, to the average person the answer to this problem seems pretty obvious… make a list! People have been very successfully making the proverbial “shopping list” or “Honey Do” lists for years, but I have always found that these lists create in me a very strange state of anxiety because for me this is no simple task.
I’m sure you are all saying a big “what the heck?!” but here’s the thing…
HOW should I make the list?
Do I make it on paper? Which paper? List paper? Normal paper? Do I make it in a notebook? What size of notebook? Does it need removable pages?! Do I do it on my computer? Or maybe on my phone? If I do it on my phone which app do I use?
THEN! How many lists do I need?
Do I make one big list of everything? Do I make one list with sub-lists? Do I make a bunch of different lists? Do I only make a list of the things I need to shop for?? OR do I make lists for everything that I need and/or want to remember in general?
Even if I DO manage to START a list how do I remind myself to put things ON the list once I have a list?
You see the problem…
My brain takes what should be a simple task and it realizes the sheer number of variables that need to somehow be taken into account to make the “perfect” list and because of the declining state of my mental faculties it grinds to a halt pretty quickly and I find myself unable to create any type of list.
Maybe this is just another part of getting old? When you realize that there are just too many options and the world is just too big and scary nowadays so you give up and hide?
Maybe one day I’ll figure out how to make a list, in the meantime if you need me there’s a good chance you can find me wandering around the aisles of the local Walmart looking dazed and confused while I desperately try and remember what was so urgent that I HAD to go to Walmart TODAY.
~ Elena <3